Alay | 45 | Secretes

So, life goes on. After the happy days and the broken hearted days, it's time for me to bring the new spirit. As for the love story, I don't really care about it now. I've set my deadline of being married at 30, so there's no rush about it now. Now it's time to enjoy my "single" status and have fun doing all i want to do. As for this blog, i'm really sorry for being absent for a long time (though there're only few readers of this blog). I'll try to make things better here and I hope someday I can build a good website, for the sake of this blog and myself. Advices and critics for this "ressurected" blog are welcome.

i think from now on i won't be able to write many long stories anymore, it'll be more like a short note for myself about anything that wanders in my life. as for today: had a nice afternoon spended with her (my girlfriend) visiting their old house, and then with our workmate visiting our ex-workmate who had her baby about a month ago. not a special moment, just happy.

so here i am again. the last post was far from over yet. there're still alot of things to say here. it's just when i write and thought about another stuff, it gets me immediately confused. so last time i (actually) decided to put a comma on that last paragraph. and here we go again. it won't end in this part as i think of a long story. whoever read my posts may actually think that i got some mental disorder. and yes, i have to admit that i am. i can feel it. it all starts when i thought that my life will end soon (-er than today). and that sucks. it's just a while for me when i'm the one who thinks that i got nothing to be proud of, nothing to share with anyone except this blog and some special friends who kept in supporting me (while being aware or not of my situation), and the majority already put a label on me as "a loser", even though they didn't forget to leave me some wisdom. hell that sucks. but that's what happens on earth when you can'...

well, almost a year away from blogging and now i was really really wanted to write, then i got no private time to pour all of my thoughts from what my brain extracted to some texts full of expression. but seems like i won't feel hesitate anymore to say anything from now on. no more secrets, it's just, anyhow, secretes. lately i've been trying my luck to Pekanbaru (telling the story later) and then went back here to Padangsidimpuan. back to the same old job but new girlfriend (yay!). yay?! whoa.. wait a second. it's not that easy to be happy for me, as it takes lots of time and courage and.. yeah, patience; to make her believe that we share the same feeling. some people may say that that won't happen to me (and i almost agreed), but, yes, she also likes me (that's what she said).

Let me begin with: Life, Love.

I caught a cold. And I caught a cold. (A post for reminding me of how cold I am (wishfully it'll change into "was"), body and soul)

aku tidak menyalahkan siapa-siapa tidak pula diriku sendiri tapi mengapa nasibku begini seperti kurang (kalau tidak bisa dibilang "tidak") beruntung ahhh... aku lelah.. lelah berpikir, lelah berbuat dunia(ku) seperti hampir tidak mau lagi bersahabat entah bagaimana dengan duniaNya