Why

Why can someone easily have a change of heart, when I can't?

Why are there people who have happy and peaceful life without much struggle and sacrifice?

When can I enjoy true happiness, when I'm already this old?

Why am I always the one who ends up suffering in a relationship?

Am I not kind enough? Is being kind wrong?

Am I not improving much?

Am I cursed?

Will I become one of those who suffer tragic ending?

I'm so tired.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Feel Good

abis minum obat.. flu gw jadi mendingan deh sekarang.. kayaknya udah mendekati fase-fase terakhir (sembuh, bukan ko'it). gak enak sakit ya.. mau ngapa-ngapain rasanya lemesss.. gak ada tenaga. job gw udah mulai selesai satu-satu nih.. masalah anak baru, beresin rumah, benerin komputer taun jebot, udah. terjemahan ama pulang masih dalam proses. lambat banget gw ngerjain terjemahannya.. masa sehari cuma dapet 2 halaman!? banyak istilah-istilah aneh sih.. jadi nyocokinnya yang lama. soal pulang.. 3 hari yang lalu gw ditelpon ma nyokap (akhirnya). n (akhirnya) gw dipersilahkan pulang.. tinggal nunggu kapan duitnya dikirim. hehehe.. pulang nih.. udah ngebet gw.. kangen ma bokap nyokap.. ama ade-ade gw.. dah pada gede-gede kli ya.. gw dikasi tau klo ade gw yang pertama udah ke riau. yah.. bangga tapi sedih juga sih.. bangga karena ade gw akhirnya berani tinggal jauh dari orang tua, padahal dulu disuruh masuk pesantren yang deket rumah aja gak mau. sedihnya gw karena ntar klo gw pulang gw
Read more

Really I Do

Gw ga peduli mau ini dibilang cuma khayalan, lebay, atau cuma obsesi, dan lain-lain yang sejenisnya yang berbau "ignorant". GW KANGEN "DIA". Entahlah, buat gw, dia itu istimewa. Mungkin terlalu istimewa buat gw.  Pendekatan sudah dilakukan, tapi gw jadi ga enak hati sendiri klo kelamaan ngedeketin tanpa ada kepastian akan apa yang selanjutnya dilakukan. Karena itu sejak beberapa waktu terakhir gw mulai mengurangi frekwensi komunikasi dengan dia. Berat memang melakukannya. Karena ya gitu, kangen. Ngelupain dia? Plis deh.. bahkan temen dan kenalan yang lama nggak ketemu kadang berlalu-lalang di mimpi dan pikiran gw. Apalagi yang seistimewa ini.. Gw lagi senang aja inget dia, membayangkan bisa berbagi kebahagiaan. Gw sedih aja inget dia, berandai-andai dia yang menemani gw mengurangi kesedihan. Gimana bisa lupa coba? Karena itu gw diam. Tapi ya gitu, kangen. Kapan gw punya cukup keberanian untuk nanyain satu kalimat itu? Rasanya seperti hipokrit d
Read more

Be Stronger

I am learning How to control myself This world seems it's all about her This possessive thinking needs a limit I need to calm down I'm sure I get a big share of her heart and mind As big as her portion inside mine But we need to do some things for ourselves by ourself too With hope and prayer for each other Oh how sweet our life is In good times and bad times We are still sweet We are a perfect couple I will fight for this relationship I will move forward, I will improve I am doing it Trying hard to not disappoint her Because I will be the one who will suffer bigger disappointment I want to please her I want her to feel truly happy with me Always happy I know my fear I fear myself That other side of myself That dark self That confused self She is already helping me a lot It's my decision to keep up or go down I want to keep up To keep improving day by day To become stronger To become smarter To become more reliable Because she is strong Much stronger than me She is heavenly
Read more